Everything is better in Grey
by Shjody
Summary: What made Alex choose the life in an international drug cartel? Alex knew another special woman before Piper was in the picture. Of course, she never told Piper.
1. Chapter 1

**I do not own anything of this story. Absolutely nothing! Though I wish I did. And I'm sorry if my English sucks, but I'm Dutch. So that's my excuse.**

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It was a cold night in New York when Alex Vause made her way to a bar to drink her thoughts away. Tonight, after 24 years of waiting, she had finally met her father. All her life she had wondered about him. Her mom didn't leave much to the imagination, seeing she called him 'the greatest Rock God that has ever walked this earth'. As you can imagine, her expectations were rather high. Knowing now that her father was a fuck up of a man that lived his life mostly for drugs, was a huge disappointment to her.

She didn't even know what to live for anymore. She didn't have a job or an education. But she always had something to work towards: one day she would meet her father and she would amaze him. But now that was gone, she felt so fricking awful that she almost thought she landed herself into a depression.

When she reached the bar, she just sat there staring in front of her. This evening had taken a rather surprising turn when a guy named Fahri offered her a job in an international drug cartel. She shook her head. Just thinking about it now, it seemed too crazy to be true.

She was lost in her own thoughts when a girl walked towards her.

"Can I have two of your best scotch on the rocks please?" The girl asked the guy behind the bar.

Her voice sounded cheerful. Alex didn't feel cheerful, so she completely ignored the happy girl.

"Here, you look like you can use this more than anyone here." The girl handed her the scotch.

"Why the hell would you spill this gorgeous scotch on me? You don't even know me." Alex was getting grumpier with the second.

"Okay, look. I'm going to tell you a little story." The girl said to her, while smiling at her.

"Once upon a time, there was this girl in a bar. She was drinking with some people, just minding her own business. Then, suddenly, this beautiful woman walked into the bar. The girl was stunned and couldn't believe her eyes. The only thing that bothered the girl was that the woman looked like she wanted to jump of the nearest building."

The girl was telling the story as if she was telling a fairytale. Alex listened intensely and almost forgot about her fucked up evening.

"The girl felt bad. How could it be that such a gorgeous woman wanted to kill herself? She had to do something about it. She had to find a solution." The girl said, raising an imaginary sword. "After hours of thinking, she finally knew the perfect solution for every problem.." The girl said, as she kept Alex waiting for the answer. "A good scotch." She pointed at the scotch. "And the right girl." She said with a grin, while pointing at herself.

Alex couldn't help but laugh. This girl was as smooth as they come. She was hot too. The girl was a bit shorter than Alex and she was a bit skinnier. Her face was really open and bright. She had dark brown hair and stunning eyebrows. Her green eyes were something you don't see everyday, as well as her full lips and strong jaw. Alex didn't regret looking at this girl at all.

Alex didn't even know she was staring, when the girl broke the silence. "Sooooo, are you going to tell me what's bothering you?" she asked.

"I don't even know your name and now I'm supposed to tell you all my dirty little secrets?" Alex said teasingly.

"Well, I did buy you a scotch. And I made you laugh." the girl said with a grin.

"I thought that was something people were just supposed to do for a beautiful lady like myself." Alex joked.

The girl smiled. It was a beautiful smile.

"Okay, here's the deal.." the girl said "I'll tell you a dirty little secret of my own and then you tell me your story. That way we're even."

Alex liked the sound of that. She really started to like this girl. It wasn't everyday that a girl came up to Alex, flirted with her and got her attention the way this girl did.

"My dirty little secret, is my name. Nobody knows my first name, 'cause I'm too embarrassed to tell anyone." she said with a pained expression.

"Nobody knows your name?" Alex asked with a shocked expression "So, how do people know what to call you?"

"Everybody calls me by my last name, which is Grey." she said with a serious face. "Everybody who ever knew my first name is dead, so nobody is going to spoil my secret. Unless you are, after I tell you." she said with a grin.

It was weird how Grey just brought up the death of her whole family and not even blink an eye about it.

"I'm sure it isn't that bad, is it? I mean, did you really have to kill your whole family just because they knew your first name?"

Alex couldn't help it, maybe it was a little bit too harsh. But then again, that was her style. Alex felt really relieved when she saw that Grey immensely appreciated her humor. When Grey finally caught her breath, she had a serious expression.

"Yes, I did. So, now you know this is a matter of life and death.." she said in a whisper. "My first name, and you better feel special now because I rarely say it out loud, is Mathilda." she pretended to gag.

Alex laughed at that. She didn't think it was a bad name, it just didn't suit her. Still, she didn't want the girl to feel bad.

"Oh, come on! That isn't that bad!" Alex said smiling.

"Isn't that bad? What would become of my reputation if people had to address me as Mathilda?" Grey said jokingly.

Alex was again staring at this girl. She came here totally depressed about her life, but somehow the girl turned it all around. And the scotch was helping too.

"Anyway.." the girl said "you owe me a dirty little secret."

"Fine. My depressing little secret is that after years and years of searching and hoping, I finally met my father tonight." Alex said. "And it wasn't a happy reunion. At all."

Alex looked sad again. She told her the whole story of what happened tonight, except the bit with Fahri in it. When she finished, Grey looked at her with a sympathatical look.

"So, basically your father is a total douchebag?" she said. Alex laughed.

"Yeah, basically he is."

"You must have an amazing mother, for you to turn out the way you did." Grey said, with a flirty smile.

"Smooth, Grey. Very smooth." Alex said with a grin. "But yes, my mom is really amazing. She is the strongest and kindest woman I know. She taught me everything." Alex said.

"Except being kind, you mean?" Grey joked. That earned her a teasing punch on her arm.

"But seriously.." Grey started. "You're an incredible person. I've only known you for.." she looked at her watch. "an hour. But even I can see that you are capable of doing anything you want. And if life would offer you a chance, whatever chance that may be, you should take it. Just do whatever your heart tells you to. You'll be okay." Grey said, while smiling reassuringly.

Alex didn't know what to say. She actually did get a chance this very night to change her life completely. Working for that drug cartel would probably be the greatest adventure she would ever have, but it would be dangerous too. Very dangerous.

While lost in her thoughts, Grey stood up.

"Before I go, I would at least like to know your name as well." Grey said.

"Alex. My name is Alex."

Grey gave her a big smile. It lit up her whole face.

"I will see you around, Alex." she said to her.

"I sure hope so.. Mathilda." Alex said grinning, she whispered the last part.

"I should never have told you that, should I?" Grey was grinning and shaking her head.

"Not in a million years."

"Put everything she orders on my tab, Josh." she said to the guy behind the bar. And then she left. But before she was out the door, she looked back at Alex and smiled.

Alex was stunned. This evening was really not turning out as it was planned, but now it wasn't the negative kind. She was smiling like a fool, while playing with her drink. Then, she picked up her phone and called the number that was on the piece of paper she had in her pocket.

"Fahri? It's Alex. I want to talk about that job you offered.."


	2. Chapter 2

That night Alex returned to her small apartment in Brooklyn alone. She went to bed but sleep just wouldn't come. She kept going over every detail of her evening. After Alex talked to Fahri on the phone she felt excited. She was really going to do this. Her talk with Grey made her confident that she could actually pull this off.

Thinking about Grey made her a little sad. Even though she was the only one on the planet who actually knew her whole name, she had no idea how to ever find that girl again. They didn't exchange phone numbers or addresses. How the fuck was she going to find one girl in a city full of girls? And who said she lived here in the first place? If she didn't, Alex would have to search the globe. It was near impossible.

She kept worrying and turning for hours, until she fell asleep around 3 o'clock. The whole time she was asleep, she was being chased by feverish dreams. Of course she didn't sleep long, seeing that her Spanish neighbours had three lovely children that all started screaming around 6.

She got up and dragged herself to the bathroom. When she looked in the mirror she could swear that she saw a panda bear instead of herself. Then she put her glasses on and saw the dark bags under her eyes that felt like they reached her knees. She took a rather cold shower, as always. It almost didn't bother her anymore because her shower was broken for almost half a year now and she had gotten used to it. She had called her landlord several times, but that guy had better things to worry about than her having a cold shower.

Fahri told her that the job was going to pay handsomely, that is if she was as good as he thought she could be. She had mixed feelings about her upcoming work. Her own father was addicted to the same drugs she would be importing. She didn't really feel guilty though. It was just business. And she'd rather be the supply than the demand.

After countless cups of coffee she had finally really woken up. The clock on the wall told her it was 11 am. She'd better hurry up if she was going to make it to her appointment. Fahri told her that she would be meeting with his best importer at a little coffee shop in the city. He would explain everything that was expected of her. She would be learning from the best. Her teacher would be guiding her that same evening to show her how it's done. Whatever that meant. Alex didn't really understand how he could show her how to smuggle drugs that very same evening, but she didn't mention this to Fahri. She would just go with it and figure it out on the way.

Luckily, the coffee shop wasn't very far from her apartment. She rushed out and started walking at a quick pace. It was quite warm outside today. So as always she regretted putting on a jacket. That was always her problem; if it was hot outside she wore too much, but if it was cold she wore too little. When she was walking she figured she should always go for the opposite of what her instincts told her about the quantity of layers to wear.

When she got to the coffee shop she wondered why she had never seen this place before. It was a nice and cozy place, especially if you compared it to the rest of the neighbourhood it was in. She was early, so she could order in peace and just find a table and wait for the mystery importer to come in. She wondered if she would recognize a drug importer if she saw one. She chuckled. If this was truly the best importer around, he would probably not be dressed as an old fashioned mafia member like she imagined.

This was the kind of coffee place where you would order at the counter and take it with you. Some sort of self service. The girl behind the bar smiled very brightly at her when she asked her what she wanted.

"A large black coffee please." Alex replied.

"Coming up!" the girl said with twinkling eyes.

Less than a minute later the girl returned with a large cup of coffee and a cookie.

"I put the cookie on there for free. Enjoy it." she whispered.

"Wow, thank you secret sugar daddy." Alex said with a grin.

The girl blushed and then went back to work, while secretly still looking at Alex from time to time. Alex didn't know why, but she had that effect on women. I mean, it was obvious that she was gay. But even straight girls would be flirting with her almost all the time. She liked it, but it never really made an impression on her though. She was used to it. But it got her free cookies, so that was nice.

Alex was scanning the place for a good spot to sit where she could have a good look at the door when she heard someone yell her name.

"Alex!"

She looked behind her toward the seats by the window, when she saw Grey sitting there. When she saw her, her heart skipped a beat. She never thought she would see her again. Of course she had been up all night hoping that fate or some other ridiculous non-existing deity would bring them together, but she didn't count on it.

She looked ridiculously gorgeous today. She was wearing a pair of gray skinny jeans and a knitted sweater that was a little too big for her. She wore her hair in a ponytail and it accentuated her face perfectly. And the smile she had when she saw Alex was just something to drown in.

"Wow, this is some weird stuff, kid." Alex said when she reached her table.

"Are you stalking me, Alex?" Grey asked with a straight face.

"Nah, I just like sleeping on the sidewalk next to your house." Alex said.

Grey laughed. "Well, you don't have to hide it anymore. So you'd better just join me for some coffee."

Alex hesitated for a second. She was really happy to see Grey, but she didn't want to explain to her what she was doing here. She was here for some serious business, so she shouldn't be distracted by anyone. Then again, she was 15 minutes early..

"I would buy you a cup of coffee, but you already have one I see." Alex said. "It would have been the least I could do after drinking for hours and hours on your tab last night."

"If I had known you were an alcoholic I wouldn't have given you a free drinking party." Grey said grinning.

Alex smiled. Grey was so easy to talk to. Alex could talk to anyone, but she was almost never challenged. Most women just smiled and nodded when talking to her. It was refreshing to have someone that actually replied.

"The girl behind the counter is looking at you every 10 seconds. Literally. I counted." Grey said smiling.

"She gave me this cookie for free too."

"How is it that you got a free cookie and I didn't even get a cup of coffee that was actually hot?" Grey wondered out loud.

"Here, have my cookie." Alex gave her the cookie. "It's the least I can do after you got me drunk last night without even being there while doing it."

Grey laughed and took the cookie. "You know, this cookie means more to me than the most expensive scotch there is." Grey said while adoring the cookie. "I'm like the fricking cookie monster." She added with her mouth full of cookie.

She looked adorable with all the cookie crumbles all over her face. Alex smiled at her while enjoying the sight.

"What?" Grey asked "Is there something on my face?"

"Just the whole cookie." Alex laughed.

It was a quarter past 12. That meant her teacher was 15 minutes late. Fahri said that the importer would find her and that she didn't have to know what he looked like. Alex wondered how someone she never met could possibly find her in a coffee shop full of people. But again, she didn't ask.

"Alex, are you waiting for someone? You keep staring at the door." Grey said. "It's making me nervous as hell."

"I'm sorry. Yes, I'm waiting for someone. It's about some.. uhm, business I got in." Alex said carefully while watching the door.

"Well, you don't have to keep staring at the door. Your "business" contact is already here." Grey said with a grin on her face.

"What are you talking about?" Alex asked. "Did you see somebody in a suit walk in or something?"

"Alex, Fahri told me you took the job." Grey said while bending a little forward to her. "He asked me to guide you through the first few weeks."

Alex looked at her with her mouth wide open. She was positive that the person she was about to meet, would be a big, scary guy in a suit. Now that she thought about it, Fahri had never said it was a man. She just added that part herself.

"Wait, so.. You're his best importer around?" Alex asked completely astonished. "But, how old are you? How did you end up doing this?" She had so many questions that needed answering.

Grey was patient with her. She understood the need to ask all these questions and she took the time answering them. "Yes, I am the best at the moment. That can change everyday though. It's a quick business and if you're not paying attention, you are out of the game." She said calmly. "I am 20 years old. I joined the business when I was 16 and worked my way up from there."

Alex was speechless. This she did not expect. Grey didn't look anything like a drug dealer. She looked like a nice girl who was still in college and enjoying her life.

"Alex, you didn't think I could pay for an open tab by working at a supermarket, right?" Grey joked with a grin.

Alex was pushing her glasses up her nose way too often. She always did that when she was slightly uncomfortable.

Grey must have seen that Alex was unsettled and slightly freaked out, because she took her hand and started reassuring her. "Hey, don't freak out. Did you prefer some sort of Godfather kind of guy?" she joked. "Because if you want that, I can just try on an Italian-American accent." She cleared her throat and continued in the ugliest Italian-American accent you could possibly imagine. "I am going to make you an offer you cannot refuse."

Alex couldn't help but laugh. She was relaxing a little bit now. The only thing that stopped her from being okay, was the fact that Grey was still holding her hand. Her heart was beating like crazy because of it.

Grey saw she was staring at their hands and looked over at the girl behind the counter, who was glaring at her. She grinned. "I'm sorry. I have to let go of your hand or otherwise she will definitely spit in my coffee the next time I go here." she said.

They both laughed. The tension was broken.

Alex felt better and was actually very happy that she got to work with Grey. Suddenly the whole prospect of working for a drug cartel didn't seem so dangerous anymore. Besides, this whole thing was a good excuse to see Grey as often as possible without being a total creep.

"Let's get to business." Grey said. She held out her hand. "Hi, my name is Grey. You must be Alex. I have heard so much about you." She said with twinkling eyes.

Alex took her hand and shook it. "Hello Grey, I'm Alex Vause." she said with her deep voice. "Thank you for meeting me today."

This would be the beginning of a beautiful.. friendship. She hoped.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you for the reviews, guys! Each and everyone of them made me smile. You rock!**

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A glorified drugs dealer. That's what she would become. That's what Grey already was. Her job wasn't to sell the drugs to people. Hell, it wasn't even her job to smuggle the drugs. The only thing Grey would do, was manage the whole thing. The way Grey talked about it, it seemed like the easiest thing in the world. When Alex started to talk about the ethical problems she might have regarding the fact that they had it sold to whomever wanted to buy it, Grey said that she shouldn't think about that.

"That sort of thinking gets you crazy within a month." Grey told her.

Alex frowned "So, you just ignore the fact that people die because you helped smuggle in the drugs?" Alex whispered that last words.

"People die. Every 3 seconds someone dies of hunger. There's no other option for them, because their governments spend the money they get from charities to buy themselves a jacuzzi instead of feeding their people." Grey said with a straight face. "The people we sell this stuff to, have a choice. They choose to use the stuff. We didn't put that needle in their arms and we sure as hell didn't push the stuff through their noses. The moment it gets sold, it's not our problem anymore."

Alex thought about her point of view in the matter. Her idea of their part in the business was very simple: As long as we don't sell it directly, we're not responsible. Grey was extremely good at gray thinking. Her ideas about what's good or bad or who's responsible were somewhat different from the regular.

They would get their orders from Fahri, or other high placed people in the business. They would tell them where they wanted the drugs or drug money to go and when they wanted to have it. It was their job to get it there safe and sound. And quietly.

"I have no fucking clue why Fahri would want specifically me doing this job." Alex said while shaking her head. "I'm always sweating like a pig when I accidentally take medicines through customs. Imagine what just dealing with a shitload of.. other stuff would do to me."

"Fahri didn't want you to do this specifically." Grey told her. "He just saw a sad and vulnerable girl and wanted to take advantage of that. I told him you would be a great asset to our business and that it would be a real shame to waste you as a drug mule."

Drug mules were the people who did the actual dirty work. They would be recruited by Grey, who promised them a life full of money and adventure. Grey knew exactly which girls to chose. She had an eye for sorting them out. That's why she was the best there is.

"Tonight I will show you how it's done. I will also show you why I think you could be really fricking good at this." Grey told her with a reassuring smile.

Grey wrote the name of a nightclub and the address on a piece of paper and then handed it to Alex. She stood up. "Meet me there at midnight. I have some errands I need to run." She gave Alex a dazzling smile and then she left.

Alex sat at the coffee place for quite a while after she left. Three cups of coffee and free cookies later she finally had her mind in order. So, the night she'd met her father Fahri had wanted to recruit her just because she was fragile at that moment. He probably thought she would be of some use in the business and had sent Grey to the bar to figure out what kind of potential she had. Grey then told Fahri that she thought Alex had potential as a recruiter. That was the only reason why Alex didn't have to start at the bottom of the food chain. Grey's opinion seemed to matter quite a bit as she single-handedly got Alex promoted before she had even started.

Before leaving the coffee shop, Alex gave an extra tip to the girl behind the counter.

"The cookies were delicious." she said with a grin.

"Here's your receipt." the girl said with a twinkle in her eyes and the biggest smile she had.

Alex looked at the receipt and chuckled. A phone number was written on the back. Beneath the phone number the girl had written: _Call me? Xoxo Jenny_. It was written in big curly letters. She threw the piece of paper away on the way out. She was never going to call Jenny. Best not get her hopes up, right?

She walked the streets of Brooklyn until her feet hurt. She realized that she had really needed the fresh air. Everything that happened in the last 24 hours, all the information she had to take in, it was all getting a bit much. Would she always worry like this? Or would she become like Grey and just shut it all off?

She thought about Grey. The girl intrigued her more than anything. 20 years old and a leading role in an international drug cartel. With the way she talked and the way she smiled, Alex wasn't even surprised that the girl had worked her way up that fast. She guessed Grey could even make a monkey share his banana with her if she wanted to.

When she looked at her watch it was already 4 in the afternoon. On her way to her apartment she hopped by this little Chinese place for some food. It was pretty early to have dinner, but she wanted to call her mom and take a long nap before meeting Grey in the city. Alex barely ever cooked anything at home. Her apartment consisted of a kitchen, a bedroom, a living room and a dining room all rolled up into one tiny room. So, one day when she felt like cooking something with garlic in it, it smelt like she wanted to fight off vampires for weeks. Needless to say; her apartment didn't ventilate very well.

While eating her noodles, she grabs her phone and starts calling her mom. Just before she hits the call button, she stops. If she called her mom, her mom would be asking how she'd been. Alex really didn't want to talk to her about meeting her father, especially after her mom warned her several times that it would be a waste of her time and energy. And if she told her she was fine, her mom would instantly know something was up. She had always sucked at lying to her mother. Alex could lie to anyone at anytime, except for that woman. So instead of calling her mom, she puts away her phone and continues slurping her noodles.

With a full stomach, she throws herself on her couch. She takes off her glasses and gently puts them on the small table in front of the couch. The couch is almost the most expensive thing in her house. It's something Alex really wanted to invest in for moments like these. Naps are very precious things.

She rubs her eyes and stretches. And after trying hard to find the most comfortable position possible, she closes her eyes.

Green eyes. Every time she closes her eyes she sees those green eyes and those gorgeous fucking lips.

"Well, fuck.."


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry that it took so long to update! I promise I will be faster with the next chapter.**

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The nightclub was called Club Zero, it was located in Chelsea. It was supposed to be one of the hottest clubs of the moment. If you were cool, you were there. A lot of so called "rebelious" kids of rich and successful people came there to not give a fuck. That was probably the reason that Grey came here to do what she does best.

Alex had to survive the subway for 40 minutes before she finally arrived at the club. When she got to the door, she saw a huge line in front of it. If she had to wait in line to come in, she would never be inside on time.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." Alex cursed as she made her way to the end of the line.

"Girl! Hey girl!" a very deep male voice shouted at her.

Alex looked up to see that a huge muscled man was the one shouting at her. She'd eat her hypothetical hat if that wasn't the bouncer of the club. Dressed all in black, including black sunglasses, he seemed to be born for his job.

"You Alex?" he asked her.

"Uhm.. yeah." she said with her eyebrows raised. "What's it to you?"

"You can go in." he said as he opened the door for her.

Alex didn't act surprised, but just casually walked towards the door. Alex grinned, while secretly enjoying all the resentful comments of the people in line.

"HEY, MY NAME IS ALEX TOO!" some extremely loud girl screamed.

"Oh my God, like we've been like waiting here for like an hour." another girl complained to her friend.

As Alex walked into the club, she was actually really surprised. The place was a whole lot bigger than it seemed on the outside. She was really impressed with how the place looked. It was rather dark, but if you looked closely at the ceiling the place looked like some sort of old train station. There were big industrial lamps hanging from the ceiling, though they weren't on at that moment. The whole club was lit with hundreds of colorful little lights. On the right was the bar, which was made entirely out of wood. On the left there was a lounge area where people sat that didn't feel like dancing. There was a DJ at the back of the club, the dance floor was, of course, in front of him.

Alex dropped her jacket off and went in. First thing she always did when she was at a club, was head for the bar. She spotted Grey before she even reached the bar. She was leaning against the bar very casually. She was standing really close to a girl and clearly telling a very interesting story. The girl was looking at her like she was the reincarnation of Jesus Christ.

Alex felt like her insides were on flames as her anger flared. She couldn't really put her finger on what she was feeling, because she never felt something like this before. Grey was smiling at the girl. It was the smile she used the first time she talked to Alex. Alex wanted to go to the girl and punch her on her stupid mouth. She had never been a violent person before. Sure, she had been in fights with her bullies when she was younger. Nothing like this ever happened.

She considered just walking away when Grey caught her eye. She quickly excused herself and came her way directly. She kept looking Alex in the eye the whole time, like there wasn't anything else that mattered. Alex's anger vanished like frost under the morning sun.

"Welcome to one of our workplaces!" Grey said with a huge smile.

Alex grinned and nodded approvingly. "I have to say: our office doesn't look half bad."

Grey laughed. "I haven't had a drink yet. I thought it would be fun to do my traditional shot of vodka together."  
"A shot of vodka is always fun." Alex said with a twinkle.

They got themselves some vodka and headed to the lounge area. Alex sat down and was quietly admiring the place when she noticed that Grey was staring at her.

Grey raised her glass. "Here's to nights we cannot remember with people we cannot forget."

"Cheers to that." Alex said and she poured the vodka down her throat.

The vibe in the club was good. Everyone was having a good time and even the music wasn't that bad. It wasn't Alex's style, but it wasn't bad.

"The first rule in our line of business is: _Don't use what you sell_." Grey said. "If you use it, you won't be able to sell it."

Alex just looked at her and nodded quietly.

"You see, it's all about control." she continued. "If you lose control, you're done. From now on you don't only have to know what _you_ are doing, but also what everybody that works for you is doing."

Alex thought about that for a minute. She had always been an organized person, but this was a big deal. She could already feel the pressure she was going to be in and frankly it scared her a little bit.

"That's why rule number one is so important." Grey said. "If you use the drugs, you will allow the drugs to control you. That cannot happen."

"We just did a shot of vodka and now you're talking about total control?" Alex asked jokingly.

"I don't know about you, lightweight, but I don't lose control over a shot of vodka." Grey said with a grin. "But it does loosen the tongue a little bit."

Alex smirked. "Please, like you need anything to loosen your tongue. That girl you talked to just now would go home with you in a second. Unless you're not loosening your tongue to talk, of course."

She wasn't going to say anything about the girl from before, but it just slipped out. Clearly, Grey noticed the slip up, because she started laughing in a certain way.

"You really don't have to worry about that girl, or any girl for that matter." Grey said to her.

Alex raised an eyebrow. "So, you never sleep with beautiful girls who really want you to?" she asked sarcastically.

Grey laughed. "Most of the girls I talk to on nights like these are indeed beautiful, but that's not why I talk to them." she said. "I know how harsh this must sound.. but they are all potential drug mules to me."

Alex frowned. On the one hand she was really relieved that the girls didn't mean anything to Grey, but on the other hand she was shocked that the girls really didn't mean _anything_ to Grey. Like they were all just objects that could be used to make money.

Grey seemed to sense her uncertainty. She leaned towards Alex. "Besides, my bed was already reserved for tonight." she said with a devilish grin.

Immediately a shiver went down Alex's spine. Alex was at a total loss for words. She closed her eyes and tried to think and most of all: breathe. She wasn't even thinking in words anymore, but in colors and sounds. She cursed her brain for failing her when she needed it most.

"What makes you think that I'm that easy?" Alex managed to get out. Concentrating was very hard with Grey this close.

"I never said it would be easy." Grey said with a smirk. She leaned in closer and Alex felt Grey's lips brush her ear. "But you'll be begging me to take you home before the night is over." she whispered.

Alex felt a warmth spread down her body. She felt her temperature rise. She was almost certain that her glasses were fogged. The tension between them was so palpable that she could almost touch it. She was sure Grey could make her beg, for anything for that matter, but she wasn't going to give in that easily.

When Grey leaned back, Alex could see a cocky grin on her face.

Alex just looked at her. Taking in how good she looked in that moment. It was beautiful to see all the colors on her face and in her hair, caused by the lights in the club. The black t-shirt and gray skinnies she was wearing might as well have been a million dollar dress. Grey didn't need fancy clothing to look stunning.

She lingered when her eyes reached her lips. She wore a very bright red lipstick that looked ridiculously good on her. Alex just wanted to kiss those lips until there was lipstick everywhere..

 _Fuck._

"Anyway," Grey continued, like nothing had happened. "I'm certain you can be a pro when you get the hang of it."

Alex raised an eyebrow. "Yeah?" she said incredulously. "And why's that?"

"Because you attract women." Grey said, her eyes bright with excitement. "You are a women _magnet_."

"Now you're just overdoing it." Alex said while shaking her head.

She didn't hope all Grey's hopes and expectations were based on the fact that she was supposed to be some sort of womanizer. That wasn't something Alex could control. And Grey just told her it was all about control. Alex didn't know if she could live up to Grey's expectations.

"Alex." Grey said with a face that said: _You have got to be kidding me?_

"No, really Grey. I'm not that good." Alex said slightly panicked.

"You have no idea what you do to women." Grey said with a seductive grin.

A blush crept up Alex's cheeks. She wanted to look anywhere except for Grey at that moment. She played with her glasses, feeling slightly uncomfortable. When her eyes wandered off to Grey's, her eyes were practically beaming confidence into her own. Grey gave her a smile that told her that she could do anything. It was bizarre how she could influence Alex without really doing anything. Maybe that was Grey's special power.

Grey stood up and offered her hand to Alex. She took it and let Grey lead her to wherever she wanted to take Alex.

Grey took her to the edge of the dance floor. The next hour she would tell Alex everything she needed to know to make tonight work. There were very easy ways to spot the perfect mules. Alex didn't see it at first, but as Grey continued to explain she began to see what she was talking about. The only things you needed to successfully do this, was a pretty good skill at reading people and a hell of a lot of charm.

After analyzing some people in the club together, Grey told her she was ready to give it a try. Grey watched her closely from the edge, while Alex walked towards one particular girl she thought fit the mule description perfectly.

The girl was standing on the other edge of the dance floor. Alex guessed she was around 21 years old, fresh out of college and looking for fun and adventure. The girl wasn't the prettiest girl in the world, but with her red hair and her high cheekbones she was definitely worth looking at. She smiled shyly at Alex when she caught Alex's eyes. _This is going to be rather easy_ , Alex thought to herself with a smirk.

She chatted the girl up and Alex found herself enjoying the role she could play when she did her job. She listened to the girl, whose name was Tara, rant about her parents that were smothering her with plans for her future. With every word Alex said, Tara became more and more entangled in Alex's web. Alex was giving Tara the attention she so desperately longed for and the girl was like putty in her hands.

Tara was trying to find her own way in this world and she was hopelessly searching for a way to be independent of her parents. Alex couldn't have asked for a better opportunity than this. She offered Tara a job that would pay extremely well and that would take her all over the world. She offered her a life full of adventure. A life where you would just seize the day and you didn't worry about the future. She gave the girl her number and told her to think about it, though she was sure Tara would most definitely take the job. If she wasn't in it for the money or the freedom, she would be in it for Alex.

When Alex walked back, she was walking with a lot more confidence than before. She felt taller and more attractive than ever before. When she reached Grey, she was smiling an enormous I-told-you-so smile.

"That was fucking exhilarating." Alex breathed out. She could barely control her enthusiasm.

"You did extremely well, Alex." Grey told her. "It seems like you were made to do this."

"It sure as hell feels that way." Alex couldn't even begin to explain what she felt. She had never had anything she was really good at. But this.. she was pretty fucking good at this.

"Our goal tonight is to reach as many potential drug mules as we can." Grey said. "Let's split up. The sooner we get this done, the better." she added with a smirk.

They both took another shot of vodka and went their own way. They never lost sight of each other, even when the other was on the other side of the club.

Alex found herself glancing at Grey every now and then. She was met by Grey's intense stare every time. It was the sexiest stare she had ever seen. She swore those green eyes could look into her very soul.

Talking to those girls and getting what she wanted, was giving Alex an enormous feeling of control. She felt in charge. She felt _alive_. And it was quite the turn on to see Grey play her own girls the way she did. Every time she looked at Grey she could feel her self control slip away from her a little bit more.

Grey winked at Alex to follow her as she walked to the back of the club. They were both standing across from each other in a long and quiet hallway in the back. Clearly, Grey and the business had a good relationship with the owners of the club.

Grey told her that they had recruited about 10 new drug mules. That would speed up business immensely, she said.

"It seems we make quite the team, kid." Alex said with a huge smile.

Grey was leaning against the wall. She looked at Alex with a smirk on her face.

"Fahri is going to be very fucking pleased with us, Alex." she said with a twinkle in her eyes. She chuckled. "If we continue like this, we could be running the fucking business by the end of the month."

It was quiet for a while. They just stared at each other. Alex was sure that Grey felt the tension between them as well.

Suddenly, Grey walked towards Alex. She was standing as close as possible now. Alex couldn't control herself any longer. Just as she was about to let lust take over, Grey took her wrists and pinned her against the wall. She pushed her body against Alex's, causing Alex to gasp for breath. Alex could feel Grey's breath on her lips. She closed her eyes to take in Grey's scent and the smell of her breath. All her senses were screaming that surely she must be in paradise, because everything was just fucking perfect.

Alex opened her eyes and saw green ones staring so intensely into hers that she shivered. Grey placed a soft kiss on a particular sensitive spot on Alex's neck. Alex gasped and her eyes rolled back a little when Grey continued to kiss her neck. Everything she touched felt like it was on fire. The good kind of fire, of course.

Grey moved her lips softly up Alex's jaw. And right when she reached her lips, she stopped. They were both breathing heavily. They were so close that they were practically breathing in each other. Grey looked into her eyes and Alex could see everything she wanted so badly reflected in them.

When their lips touched, it felt like the whole world around them disappeared. Alex felt dizzy and disoriented, but so fucking good at the same time. Grey's full lips fit perfect onto hers. As she felt her tongue collide with Grey's, she couldn't help but moan. Things were heating up real fast and Alex tried to wiggle herself loose of Grey's grip. But she strengthened her grip on Alex's wrists.

"Grey.." Alex moaned. "Please, let me.. Just.."

"Say it." Grey breathed out, her eyes filled with need.

Alex brought her lips to Grey's ear. "Please, take me home with you." she whispered in her low husky voice.

Grey let go of her wrists. She kissed Alex passionately while running her hands through her dark hair. Alex took this opportunity to let her hands explore Grey's body. Out of nowhere, Grey broke the kiss. They both needed to catch their breaths.

"Your wish is my command, m'lady." Grey said with a huge smirk.

She took Alex's hand and led her straight to the door.


	5. Chapter 5

**Promised to update soon, so here ya go!**

* * *

 _Six years later._

She had just settled in. Some weird lady had just made her bed for her. Which was strange, but nice either way. Lying on the top bunk and just staring at the wall seemed like the logical thing to do when you had just arrived at prison. When she was a kid, she had always thought that this was what people would do in prison; just stare at the wall and sleep. She now realized that this absolutely wasn't the case. Sure, if you were sent to solitary the wall would be your only companion, but in here you were never alone with the wall, even if you wanted to be. You had to put up with a lot of other inmates. You had to work with them, eat with them, sleep with them, shower with them and even shit with them. Yeah, sometimes you would really prefer to only have the wall.

Her roommates had told her that dinner time would start in about an hour. That gave her an hour to stare at the wall and feel miserable. How the actual fuck did she end up in this god forsaken hole? How could she let this happen? If she had been certain about one thing in her life, it was that she would never end up here. She would never get caught. And in the end, she didn't get caught. But she still ended up in prison. _Fuck_.

She closed her eyes and took three deep breaths just to clear her mind. She felt weak. The most important thing for her right now, was to get control of her situation. She was in prison and she would continue to be so for a long time. The best thing she could do, was to make her time here as easy as possible. She opened her eyes and sat up. As much as she wanted to just lay there for the rest of her miserable life, she couldn't be seen as weak. She wasn't weak. This was just another adventure she had to go through. Another job that needed to be done. Her life thus far had shown her what it meant to suffer. If she could survive all of the shit life threw at her, she could most certainly survive this.

It felt good taking control. Determination was a great feeling, even if you were in prison.

The red light in the room went on. The bald lady told her that it was count time. They would have dinner after that. At 4:30. Dinner. Her rhythm would most certainly be fucked up for the next few days.

After count was over she made her way to the cafeteria. It wasn't really that hard to find; just follow the bald and the weird lady. She made sure she was walking straight. She replaced the twinkle of fear that was spread across her face with a semi confident smile. She didn't really feel attractive in her orange prison clothes, but she had to say that they fit her perfectly. They were comfortable as hell.

* * *

They were sitting at the table where they always sat. Piper was sitting next to her, smiling at her every once in a while. After spending some time in the SHU, Piper was practically moaning with every bite of the prison food she took. Nichols was sitting across the table facing the line, telling some very gross story about a plant growing out of her toe. It was just another typical day in prison. Alex looked at Piper and immediately a smile drew across her face. Piper returned the favor with a huge smile that lit up her whole face.

"God, you two should really get your own damn chapel or something." Nichols said while rolling her eyes. "If I didn't know better, I'd say you two weren't even listening to me." she added with fake disappointment.

Alex grinned. "Sorry Nicky." she said with a very sincere voice. "Piper is just distracting me with her food moaning, I can't help it."

Nichols laughed before immediately getting distracted herself when she saw some new orange standing in line.

Nichols whistled softly. "This must be my lucky day." she said while running her hair through her bushy hair. "The fresh meat is getting fresher every fricking time."

Boo plopped down next to Piper. "You talking about the new girl, Nichols?" she said with dirty look on her face. "The things I would do to her." She continued to describe exactly what she would do to her. It wasn't very pretty.

"Let's play a little game of _Pussy or Dick_?" Nichols suggested.

Piper just shook her head. Boo on the other hand was very excited. "Winner gets a candy bar." she said.

"Okay, Chapman and Vause, pussy or dick?" Nichols asked.

"I didn't even see her face, Nicky." Piper exclaimed. "How do I know someone's sexual orientation by looking at her back?"

Alex quickly glanced over her shoulder to look at the girl. "Definitely pussy." she said confidently with a smile.

Nichols laughed. "See, Chapman? Vause can. So you can too."

"Fine." she sighed. "Dick."

Boo looked troubled. "Though I really want it to be pussy, I'm going to have to go with dick."

"Dick or pussy, it doesn't matter. She will be a full grown lesbian by the end of her sentence when I'm through with her." Nichols said with a smirk. "But, I'm also going with dick."

Alex wasn't even paying attention anymore. She was talking to Piper and concentrating on getting her food down her throat.

"Hey! Orange!" Nichols yelled at the girl. "Come sit here." she ordered.

The girl walked towards their table and sat down next to Nicky. Alex wasn't really interested, so she didn't even look up.

"So, Orange, we were wondering.." Nichols said. "Dick or pussy?"

The girl kept quiet for quite a while. She shook her head and smiled. "Pussy." she said.

Alex's head shot up. She felt like throwing up everything she had just eaten as the walls seemed to be closing in on her. She looked at the girl. She couldn't stop looking at the girl. Tears were forming in her eyes. Her mind was racing at a thousand miles per hour. Somewhere far away she could hear her friends reacting surprised and laughing. She could hear Nichols asking the girl's name somewhere far far away.

"Grey." the girl answered. "My name is Grey."

Alex stood up, took her tray and went for the door. Not looking back as the others were yelling at her to come back. She just needed to get away. Now.


	6. Chapter 6

**Another chapter has arrived! Hope you like it.**

* * *

"Where are you going, Vause?" Nichols asked with a frown. "We just sat down?"

Alex didn't reply as she walked away as fast as she could.

"Alex!" Piper yelled. "Hey!"

But Alex didn't look back as they watched her back disappear into the hall. Piper just sat there with a confused look on her face. She looked at Nichols for some kind of explanation, but she just raised her eyebrows and shook her head with the same confusion. The only person who seemed calm and didn't look surprised about the whole situation, was the new girl. The girl just started eating as if nothing happened.

"What just happened?" Boo asked, breaking the silence.

"Beats me." Nichols said. Then she turned her attention to Grey. "You care to explain what happened here, Orange?"

The girl looked up. "I just arrived here little more than an hour ago and now _I'm_ the one you're asking questions to?" she said with a grin. "And here I thought _I_ was the rookie."

Nichols raised her eyebrows, leaned back and let out a surprised chuckle. Boo laughed at the girl's answer. The girl had her wit about her, that was for sure.

Piper wanted to stand up and go after Alex, when Nichols grabbed her arm. "Hey, just eat something first." she said. "Let her cool down, y'know."

Piper nodded. She was worried and confused by Alex's reaction, but she would talk about it later. She continued eating her delicious meal, but couldn't help glancing at the girl that was sitting next to Nichols. She didn't know who she was and why she was in here, but she did know that seeing her had upset Alex. Piper couldn't quite place the feeling she got when she was around the girl. She looked nice enough, but Piper couldn't help but feel intimidated by her as well.

The girl, Grey, ate her meal in silence. Then she stood up. "Well, it was a pleasure meeting you all." she said with a wink and a grin. "I guess I'll be seeing you around, since we all live together now." And then she left towards her dorm room.

It was quiet for a while after she'd left.

"Well, the girl is something else, am I right?" Nichols said, she seemed impressed.

"I just thought she'd be a nice piece of tail, but damn." Boo said with her eyebrows raised.

They finished the rest of their meal in a relative silence. Nichols cracked a joke every now and then, but Piper was too far away in her own thoughts to even listen to them.

After dinner time was over, Piper went to find Alex. She started at her bunk, which was empty. After that she tried the bathroom, the rec room and the library. With no success. That meant there was only one place left where Alex could possibly be hiding. So, Piper made her way to the chapel.

* * *

She wished it was physically possible to hug her knees even tighter. She wanted to escape her own mind, now more than ever. Being in prison wasn't a nice experience to begin with, but it's even harder when your ex-lovers start showing up on a regular basis. The worst part was that the two ex-lovers that were in prison with her right now, weren't just some flings. She had loved them both. Grey and Piper were the only people in the world that had ever meant anything _more._

She couldn't run from this one. She literally couldn't run away any further than the fucking chapel. Alex didn't know how to handle the unexpected turn this day had taken. The whole Piper coming to prison thing wasn't that much of a shock, seeing that she ratted her out herself. But being confronted with Grey in this way had fucked her up real bad.

Alex didn't know how long she'd been sitting there when she heard the chapel doors open and some very recognizable footsteps that were coming her way. She smiled a small smile. Of course Piper knew where to find her, it had only been a matter of time. She closed her eyes.

Before opening her eyes to see Piper, Alex already knew she was close. Her scent was so familiar to Alex that she didn't even need any of her other senses to recognize the woman that sat down next to her. A warm soft hand stroked her cheek softly. Alex felt her panic fade just a little, just enjoying Piper's touch.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Piper asked her softly.

Alex knew Piper was really eager to know what the hell had happened back there, but she was taking it slow because she saw how vulnerable Alex was right now.

"No." Alex said with a quivering voice. She put her glasses on her head and began rubbing her eyes. She let out a huge sigh.

Piper pursed her lips together. Of course she wasn't at all satisfied with that answer, but she didn't want to push Alex in telling her either. So she took a deep breath and kept all the questions that she had inside. She put her arm around Alex's broad shoulders and stroked her upper arm. It was the best she could do for Alex at the moment. Alex laid her head on Piper's shoulder and they sat there as long as they could until last count.

* * *

While Nicky was known around prison for her ruthless sense of humor and even bigger attitude, she liked just laying quietly in her bunk thinking about things that happened inside these walls. The thing she enjoyed most about life behind bars, was the drama. If you want to figure out the perfect recipe for a drama bomb, you should put hundreds of women together in a place they can't get out of. Drama. Will. Happen.

She grinned. During dinner time today something had happened that no one had seen coming. Following the Vauseman drama had been an epic way of spending her time lately. She had gotten a lot of information about their past by frequently poking both women with a bunch of uncalled for questions. She even bluffed her way through Piper admitting on squirting one time. God, that was some funny shit right there.

But today was a whole new level of epic. You see, over the last couple of months Nicky thought she'd gotten to know Alex Vause pretty damn well. Alex Vause was someone who was always in control. She had her emotions in check, even with Piper acting like an asshole back then. Sure, she let go of her anger every now and then, but she never lost total control of her emotions like she did today. It fascinated Nicky to see it happen. And over what? Was she really that shocked that the girl liked pussy!? No, there was a history there. And if someone was going to get to the bottom of this, it would be her.

* * *

After last count, Grey lay on her top bunk staring blankly ahead. She couldn't cry. She had promised herself that she would be in control and she wasn't going to break that promise. Her heart on the other hand, did what it wanted. It was beating like a drum.

The whole ' _trying your best on making this an easy experience'_ thing, had proven to be even more difficult than it had seemed a few hours ago. It was a miracle that she didn't lose it right there, when she saw Alex. It had taken all of her will power to pull her eyes away and concentrate on the words the bushy haired woman was saying to her. She didn't even know what she would have done if she would have lost control. She couldn't decide between kissing Alex or punching her in the face. Maybe she'd have done both.

Grey closed her eyes and concentrated on breathing steadily. When she'd finally calmed her mind as well as her body, she dozed off into an uneasy sleep. Her very first night in prison.


	7. Chapter 7

Alex didn't wake up that morning, as she didn't sleep at all that night. She actually felt very relieved when she could finally leave her bunk. So she dragged herself through the halls and into the bathroom. She felt dirty from the day before and couldn't wait to wash it all away. Alex always showered this early; the water would be kind of warm and the bathroom would be empty for the first 3 minutes or so. The semi warm water reminded her of her little apartment in Brooklyn. Sometimes she would just close her eyes and pretend to be back there. Back to the life before this whole mess began. Back when her mom was still alive. It usually made her feel a little better, until her daydream would be rudely interrupted by other inmates stomping into the bathroom.

It's true what they say; you almost feel like a human being again after a decent shower. She hesitantly made her way to the mirror, afraid of what she might encounter on the other side of it. It wasn't even that bad.. until she put her glasses on. She let out a huge sigh. Her eyes were all puffy from the crying and the bags under her eyes were enormous. And to make it all worse, Nichols just walked into the bathroom..

"You're looking extremely fit this morning, Vause." she said with a huge grin.

"Shut up, Nicky." Alex grumbled.

It was quiet for a while. Nicky was clearly waiting for an explanation about what happened the day before. When she realized she wouldn't get one, she took matters into her own hands.

"So, you gonna tell me what the hell happened yesterday, between you and Orange?" she asked directly.

Alex had dreaded this moment. Nicky's curiosity would be the death of her someday.

"No, I'm not." Alex said gruffly. "And it's none of your business, so let it go."

Nicky stared at her and then she narrowed her eyes a bit. Alex knew that look all too well. Nichols was not going to let this go. She had practically just given her a reason to dig as deep as she could. Alex could kick herself. " _Let it go_ " always meant the direct opposite to her bushy haired friend.

"Don't you have a mother to annoy or something?" Alex said rudely.

"I do, actually." Nichols said with a big smile. "I'll see you at breakfast. I'll save you a seat!" She winked and walked out.

Alex returned to the task of trying to fix the face that was staring at her in the mirror, with no success.

She first returned to her bunk before going to the cafeteria. Most mornings she would meet Piper there, because they didn't sleep in the same neighborhood.

Alex thanked all non-existent Gods out there that she didn't bump into Grey before she'd had her coffee. When she walked in, she saw the usual crew sitting at their usual table. She got herself some "breakfast" and sat down in between Piper and Boo. Piper smiled at her sympathetically and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. She felt Piper's hand stroking her back gently. Piper's touch always seemed to calm her.

Nicky was sitting across the table and was grinning at her like an idiot. Morello sat next to her and smiled just a little too compassionately, which told Alex that Nicky had shared everything she knew with Morello.

"You look a little tired, Alex." Morello said. "You didn't sleep well?"

Alex just shook her head. Why the hell would anyone talk before coffee?

She was just about to take her first sip of coffee, when something orange sat down next to Nichols. Not something, _someone_ orange. _Figures_ , Alex thought while rolling her eyes.

"Hey there, Orange!" Nicky said with a twinkle in her eyes. "Didn't think I'd see you here this morning."

"Good morning, fellow inmate." Grey said with fake seriousness. "And other fellow inmates."

Morello offered her hand. "Hi there! I didn't get the chance to meet you yesterday. I'm Lorna Morello." she said with a bright smile.

Grey shook her hand. "Hello, Morello. I'm Grey." Grey said. "You're actually the first person that has introduced herself." she added with a smile.

Morello looked shocked. "No problem, I'll introduce them for ya." she said.

She cleared her throat and started naming all people at the table. "This little rascal right here, is Nicole Nichols." Morello said with a smile.

"That's Big Boo." Boo waved at her.

"That right there is Piper Chapman." Piper gave her a small smile.

"And then of course there's uh.. Alex Vause." Morello said that last part hesitantly.

It was the first time she had consciously looked at her. It felt strange just being in her presence again after all those years. After a few seconds, Alex looked back at her. Their eyes met and Grey felt dizzy. Her heart was beating at an unhealthy rate. After what seemed like an hour, Nichols cleared her throat.

"So, Orange, what did you do?" she asked directly.

"Subtle as ever, Nicky." Boo chuckled.

Grey looked at her tray, frowning.

"I really don't want to talk about that." she finally said, with a flash of pain in her eyes.

A shiver went down Alex's back when she heard Grey say that. She looked at her then, taking in every little detail. She suddenly looked so vulnerable. It was very unlike Grey to show her insecurities or imperfections and for every other person it wouldn't have been that obvious, but Alex had known that woman like the back of her hand. Something had happened to her, something that had knocked down those huge ass walls of confidence.

"Look, I don't make the rules." Nicky said while shrugging. "But if you can correctly name all of our crimes, then we're even."

"Okay, deal." Grey said with a smirk.

Grey spent the next 5 minutes observing everyone at the table. Analyzing people's behavior was something Grey used to do for a living, so it wasn't all that hard to figure most of the people out. Piper, however, was a hard one. She looked like someone who had never committed a crime in her whole life. Then Grey saw the way Piper was looking at Alex and she suddenly realized what Piper's weakness was.

"Okay, Orange." Nicky said. "Your time is up."

Grey pointed at Morello. "Fraud."

She pointed at Boo. "Violence."

Then she pointed at Nicky. "Junkie."

After that was Piper's turn. "Trusting the wrong person." She said with a smirk.

And finally she reached Alex. "And last but not least, we have the drug importer."

Her eyes lingered when she met Alex's eyes, which stared into hers with an intensity that was almost palpable. She didn't know if it was a positive or negative stare, but she didn't really care. Then Alex just raised her eyebrows and went back to her breakfast.

"How the hell did you do that?" Boo asked, looking very surprised.

"It was my job to analyze people." Grey answered. "Before I would take advantage of them, that is."

Morello seemed a little insulted and started a conversation with Piper. Nichols, however, seemed really impressed.

"That's one heck of a skill." She said.

Nicky looked at Alex, but Alex remained quiet and just pretended they weren't there. She then looked back at Grey and grinned.

"So, Orange, you two know each other?" Nicky said while pointing at Alex.

Alex stiffened before glaring at Nicky. Everyone at the table went quiet, waiting for the answer.

Grey smirked. "Are you kidding me?" she said. "I taught Alex everything she knows." She looked Alex directly in the eye when she said it, raising an eyebrow, almost challenging her.

Piper's mouth fell open. Alex felt like she had just been smacked in the face. She clenched her jaw, pursed her lips together and felt her anger started rising.

"I guess you didn't teach me well, then." Alex spat at her. "Seeing I'm in prison and all."

Hearing her voice was a really strange sensation to Grey. She had loved that voice and once she had longed to hear that voice more than anything.

"I never said I was a _good_ teacher." Grey said calmly with a grin.

Everyone was watching the situation intensely, like they were watching their favorite soap. Everyone except for Piper and Nichols. Piper still looked very shocked like she couldn't quite place what was happening. Nichols' eyes, on the other hand, were twinkling like it was Christmas morning.

"God, if a girl like you asked me to work for some sort of drug lord I would have done it in a heartbeat." Nichols mused, while grinning at Grey.

Grey gave a short, mirthless laugh and just shook her head a little.

"Oh, but Alex wasn't really in it for the girl. Right, Alex?" Grey said with an evil smile. "She was only in it for the power."

With that, Alex jumped up. She was breathing heavily and her face saw red with anger.

"Fuck. You." She spat with venom before stomping away.

Piper stood up and quickly went after Alex. Boo chuckled and Morello looked like she didn't know whether she should laugh or be shocked about the whole situation. Of course, Nichols looked like she was in heaven.

"You sure know how to push her buttons." Nicky said with a smirk.

"You have _no_ idea." Grey said with a grin.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey, guys! In case you were all confused, this chapter is a FLASHBACK. I repeat: FLASHBACK.**

* * *

Grey woke up really peacefully that morning. The sun was shining brighter than normal and she almost couldn't think of a better way to wake up than this. That it is, until she started looking at the gorgeous girl that was lying next to her. She silently admired her for a while, before very carefully climbing out of bed. Her lover shifted, but didn't wake up. She picked up Alex's shirt, sniffed it and then put it on.

She made her way to the kitchen, which was quite a walk. They were at Grey's apartment in Manhattan, which was about 5 times the size of Alex's old apartment in Brooklyn. It wasn't like she couldn't afford an even bigger house, but she liked to keep things cozy. Grey fell in love with the apartment the moment she saw it; with its beautiful wooden floors, lots and lots of light coming through the large windows and the stunning view. She had done the styling of her apartment all by herself. A friend of hers was an interior designer, but Grey just didn't like the thought of someone else deciding what her home should look like. A real home can only be built by the people that live in it and love in it. Call her old fashioned, but that's just the way her cookie crumbled.

The whole way to the kitchen she was smiling like a fool. She couldn't remember the last time she'd been this happy. Hell, she had never been this happy in her entire life! The last 5 years all she did was work harder to climb higher. She had loved almost every moment of it, but it always felt incomplete; like there was something missing. Until now, she never knew what it was. Doesn't the saying go something like: 'You can't miss what you've never had.'? That's total bullshit. She'd never known love, not even as a child. Still she would wake up every day with a nagging feeling, like everything she did wasn't worth anything because she couldn't share it with anyone.

She started making coffee for Alex, smiling when she thought about the woman in her bed. She knew Alex would barely talk to her before she had her coffee, especially when they hadn't really slept all night. She could still feel Alex on her body, little tickling sensations on her skin where here hands had grabbed her or where her mouth had loved her. She bit her lip. It took a lot of self-control not to barge into the bedroom and repeat what they had done all night.

When she walked into the bedroom, carrying a tray with coffee and some cookies, Alex was just waking up. She grunted, stretched and reached for her glasses before sitting up.

Grey sat down on the bed.

"Good morning." Grey whispered seductively. She leaned in to kiss Alex softly on the lips while simultaneously pushing the cup of coffee into Alex's hands.

Alex smiled thankfully before taking a sip of her coffee. She practically moaned the whole time while drinking it. Grey just looked at her, enjoying every second she spent with Alex Vause.

It had been 10 months since Grey had taken Alex to the club to teach her the ropes. Ever since that night, they had worked as a team. Grey had asked Kubra permission to keep Alex on as her assistant. They were such a good team that they could be doubling their original amount of imports, maybe even more.. It turned out they could do more, a lot more. They were practically running the whole West Coast together and Grey wouldn't be surprised if they would get some new territory very soon.

Things were running impossibly smooth. Alex wasn't really her assistant anymore, but more like a partner in crime. Literally. Of course she was still her assistant in title, but Alex had proven herself to be way more than that. Grey was in charge of paying Alex and she always made sure that Alex got 50% of what she got paid herself, instead of paying her as a lesser employee.

Alex practically lived at her apartment nowadays. She still owned the tiny place in Brooklyn, but they mostly used it for associates that needed a place to crash. It worked out pretty well thus far and Grey wasn't someone who thought about the future. She just enjoyed being happy for as long as it would last.

"You were up early." Alex finally said, after the caffeine kicked in.

Grey raised an eyebrow. "I was up about 15 minutes when you woke up." She said.

"Hey, I'm not complaining." Alex said with a grin. "I wish I could wake up with you wearing that shirt and bringing me coffee every day."

Grey smirked. "Maybe I'll do the same tomorrow.." She said. "And I'll leave the shirt off."

"Even better." Alex said, while leaning in to kiss her.

It was a hungry kiss, full of need. Alex pushed her over and pinned her on the bed.

It was incredibly sexy to have a naked woman on top of you, kissing you like it was her last day on this earth. Grey struggled to break free of Alex's grip, so she could touch her the way she wanted to. Alex, however, wasn't going to let her go that easily. Alex broke the kiss, only to look at Grey with a smug grin on her face.

That was the limit. Grey wanted to do nothing more than wipe that grin off of her face and fuck her until she couldn't do anything but sigh her name over and over again. With sheer determination and a lot of her strength, she surprised Alex and pushed her over. The tables were turned this time around.

Alex's eyebrows were raised with surprise, when Grey suddenly sat on top of her. Grey had no time to lose; she took Alex's glasses and quickly put them on their nightstand before attacking Alex with a kiss that took her breath away.

She felt Grey's hands running through her hair and then traveling down to feel every inch of her body. She couldn't think of anything else but the girl on top of her and the things she wanted to do to her. She grabbed her shirt and almost ripped it off. Grey gasped when she felt their naked bodies push against each other. If this wasn't heaven, she didn't know what was.

Alex felt Grey's full lips travel down her body, nibbling on her nipples on the way. Her whole body was on fire and all she wanted now was to feel Grey right.. there. Alex's back arched when she felt her take control of her body. She closed her eyes and enjoyed everything she knew would come.

It was incredible what this girl could do to her. She had never experienced sex like this before. It was as if they'd just leave earth to be on their own little planet for a while, not thinking about anything but pleasing each other.

Alex came almost immediately, not having enough strength in her to keep control over her body. She barely sighed out her high, when she felt Grey's fingers inside of her. Alex gasped and then let out a moan. Those fingers could push her over the edge every time. When she looked in Grey's eyes, her pupils had widened so much that she could barely see the green in them. Grey was the personification of pure sex to her. The look in her eyes sent her over the edge, again.

Alex lay on her back, breathing heavily as if she just ran the marathon. She could barely think in sentences and speaking was out of the question. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling of sheer bliss spread across her body.

Grey was just about to lie besides her, when the phone rang. She let out a sigh and ran her hand through her hair.

"Sorry, Alex." She said in an apologetic matter. "You know I have to take this."

Alex just looked at her and gave her a reassuring smile.

"Of course, kid." Alex said. "Don't worry, I'll deal with you later." She added in a sexy tone.

Alex lay back down. She couldn't help but feel annoyed by the fact that no matter how much Grey paid her, Grey was still the one in charge. Grey always told Alex that they were partners, equals. But Grey was always the one getting the calls, taking the deals and getting the credit. Alex was 4 years her senior and yet she was the junior in their business. She didn't want to feel this way, but she did anyhow.

Grey walked back into the room, still naked. "So, I have to leave for Europe tomorrow." She said all excited. "I think they might want us to take over Europe, Alex."

Alex sat up and put her glasses on. Grey was pacing up and down the room, while still running her hand through her hair.

"This is HUGE, Alex." She said seriously. "I'm going to Amsterdam tomorrow to talk to some of Kubra's men down there. I don't know how long I will stay there, but when I'm away you're in charge of our territory." She said in a serious tone.

Alex just nodded with a small smile on her lips her eyes filled with determination.

This was her chance to prove herself to Kubra.


	9. Chapter 9

**HI GUYS. Sorry for the very late update, but I just returned from my holiday to France.**

* * *

Grey lay awake just thinking about that particular memory. It would be the second last time she'd see Alex, even though she didn't know it at the time. She had been so focused on her and Alex reaching their goal of running Europe that she hadn't seen the signs, the signs of uncertainty and discontent that Alex clearly showed. Looking back she cursed herself for not seeing it sooner.

She shifted to her side and tried hopelessly to get some sleep. If it weren't her thoughts that kept her awake it would be that damned machine of the weird lady. She found out that the weird lady was called DeMarco and the bald lady's name was Miss Rosa. She guessed it was better knowing their names, since she couldn't really keep calling them bald and weird lady.

She thought about breakfast a few days ago. She didn't mean to push Alex the way she did. It was simply too hard for her to act normal around Alex. The tension of that first breakfast had been too much and it made her say things she regretted now. Of course, she wasn't lying when she said those things. The things she had blurted out were based on facts of their shared past. She only regretted that everyone heard them.

The days that followed that disastrous event were better though. Both she and Alex did their best to stay as far away from each other as humanly possible in a prison. If Grey entered the cafeteria when Alex was already there, she would just sit at another table and vice versa. Alex even made sure that she wasn't the one taking in the laundry on her specific laundry day. It had worked out really well for everyone so far. Even Nichols was pretty much okay with the decrease of drama, although she still did her very best to find out about their history.

Living the prison life did get a lot easier the longer she was in. Even though she didn't have a job assignment yet, she created her own kind of prison routine. Once every two days she would get up extra early to take a shower, so she could "sleep in" the other days. Afterwards she had a quiet breakfast with little to no company. She then spent her time reading and once in a while she took a walk down all the areas that weren't out of bounds for her. Every time she saw a hint of Alex or her people, she walked back to her room to avoid unpleasant situations. Her lunches and dinners were usually a lot less peaceful than her breakfasts, as Nicky hopped by almost every time. She didn't mind though; the girl had a great sense of humor and was witty as fuck. Grey couldn't help but laugh at the stupid stories Nichols told her. And at the end of each day she did her best not to think about Alex. Both Alex of the past and Alex of the present were not allowed into her head. But no matter how hard she tried, until she hadn't managed shutting out the unwelcome thoughts.

Grey let out a deep sigh. _Better luck next time._

* * *

Nichols was lying in her bunk. Things got pretty quiet in their good ol' prison. Nichols didn't mind though. Too much drama wasn't good for anybody. It's like eating your favorite meal all day every day – after a while it gets boring. She wasn't planning on letting this go, though. Vause really didn't want her to know what had happened between them, which had sparked her curiosity even more. Alex was like her best friend in here so if she wasn't going to tell her, Nicky had to find out on her own.

The last couple of days she had accompanied Orange during lunch and dinner. She was intrigued by the girl she started to get to know during their conversations. The girl was around her own age, but seemed to have been through a lot more in her life. You wouldn't say she was damaged by the way she acted or talked, but Nicky could tell. Underneath all the cleverness and sarcasm, were scars. But there was something else that bothered Nichols – something she couldn't quite put her finger on. There was some sort of dangerousness underneath as well.

It wasn't just the fact that she was curious that drove her to the girl, but she actually liked her. She enjoyed the company of the girl and she liked to make her laugh. One time she made the girl spray water through her nose. It was disgusting, but funny. Nichols smiled thinking about it. There should be more people like Orange in this prison. It would be a lot easier to live here without all the other stupid pieces of shit around her.

* * *

Piper was tossing and turning in her bed. She had tried talking to Alex several times now, but every time Alex would change the subject entirely. It frustrated Piper. It wasn't like she could blame Alex for having had girlfriends before her in the past. She just wanted to know the truth. Piper knew it must have been a big deal, because Alex had been acting weird ever since she saw Grey.

Piper wasn't one to complain about anything though – she had her own fucked up situation with Larry. She still hadn't talked to him since she got locked up in the SHU for 'lesbian activity', which she didn't even do. Of course she had committed the crime the second she got back from solitary, thus cheating on Larry.

She couldn't expect Alex to tell her everything right away, not with Piper having two relationships at the same time. It wouldn't be fair to force her to tell it, when Alex really didn't owe her anything. She enjoyed being able to touch Alex again. It had been so very long and it brought back all the feelings she had all those years ago. She knew that she shouldn't be feeling this way – it still felt like Alex was hers, even though she herself belonged to someone else. Sooner or later she would have to make a decision.

* * *

Fuck her. Alex couldn't stop thinking about the girl that just happened to walk back into her life. She didn't ask for this. Seeing her again felt like someone punched her in the gut. Ten times. She looked almost the same as she did when they met, but the years had done her good. Maturity looked very good on her.

She couldn't explain to Piper what it did to her just seeing Grey. When she and Piper had been together, she had never once spoken about Grey. Grey was her weak spot and at that point in time she couldn't allow people to see her weak side. Alex was surrounded by her employees for most of the time and she knew she had to be tough around them. She had learned that from the best.

After that particular breakfast a few days ago, Alex had been furious. Those words had stung her deeper than she ever cared to admit. She knew she deserved them, but that didn't make it right. The worst part was that the words kept echoing in her ears, haunting her in her dreams. It made her think about the person she was back then and the things she had done. And _that_ hurt her more than anything Grey could ever say to her.


	10. Chapter 10

**I'm so sorry for the late update! Here's another FLASHBACK.**

* * *

She took a deep breath, taking in every little detail of this moment – the smell, the sounds, the way she felt. Walking down the quiet streets of Amsterdam at sundown wasn't something you did every day –it was something you had to enjoy thoroughly. She couldn't believe she just did it. Her meeting with Kubra's men went silky smooth. They were impressed with the work she'd done in her area and could really use someone with her talents to run Europe the same way. She would be working together with a small team led by her. The headquarters were located in Amsterdam. They gave her an apartment in the ancient city center. She threw the keys of her new apartment in the air and caught them with a grin. Everything was going so _fricking_ well, it was near impossible to believe.

She couldn't wait to call Alex to tell her the good news about their new home. However, she had to be careful with the phones she used. There was a strict set of rules in the organization about the use of cellphones – if you used one particular phone too long, you could blow up the whole business. So she decided to wait. Alex knew how these things worked and wouldn't be worried if she didn't hear anything for a few days. Still, Grey couldn't wait to hear her girl's voice again.

Right after they delivered the good news to her, she made arrangements to get her own stuff flown over. She hired a company who would help Alex with packing everything they needed and transporting it to the Netherlands. Their apartment was already furnished, but she just couldn't leave all of her old stuff behind. There were some things that held too many memories to throw away. The company promised her that her belongings would be there in about 5 days. But she didn't really care about her stuff. The only thing she was so anxious to see, was Alex. It felt horrible to be without the beautiful woman for this long.

When she finally reached the house that was supposed to be theirs, she couldn't believe how beautiful their street was – all of the houses were something that could be seen as typical old houses in Amsterdam and they looked out at the canal. She went in and thanked God that there was an elevator, as she had to go to the 4th floor and her legs were exhausted from all the walking. Standing in front of the front door, she paused for a second. She didn't know what to expect on the other side and she was actually a little bit nervous about her new home. She took a deep breath and opened the door.

Her eyes went wide and her jaw almost dropped to the floor. She was looking at an amazing decorated and incredibly spacious house. The floors were the original wooden floors that had been there since the day the house was build and the walls were white but filled with all sorts of paintings. The living room consisted of a very comfy looking couch and two soft chairs and a flat screen TV that was worthy of the name 'Home Cinema'. There was this huge bookcase filled with all sorts of books. The kitchen was very modern in comparison to the rest of the house – the cupboards were black and the countertop was made of white marble. The kitchen was filled with all kinds of kitchen gadgets. Grey enjoyed exploring the house - every time she entered a room she was surprised by the beauty and magnificence of it. Their new bed looked like it was sent down from heaven and she couldn't wait to sleep in it.. amongst other things. There was a huge office that was clearly designed to be the main place she would be working from. And last but not least, the apartment gave access to this amazing rooftop garden with a view to die for.

"I think we're going to be just fine here." Grey said to herself, with a bright smile on her face.

* * *

Life in Amsterdam was something she had to get used to. The people were nice and they spoke perfect English, but she couldn't believe the amount of bikes in the city. Every time she left the house she had to be careful not to be hit by at least 10 of them. She wouldn't begin work until Alex got there, so she took her time exploring the city. It was full of culture and fun things to do. She tried several coffee places, just to know which one to go to when Alex got here. She wanted Alex to feel at home. She would do anything to make that woman happy.

She bought a cheap ass prepaid phone in the city so she could call Alex, finally. But when she tried, it went to voicemail. She tried several times. No answer. Grey frowned. She thought Alex would've been anxious to hear from her after all this time. Maybe she was busy or sleeping. She wrote her a text.

 **TO ALEX: Hi Alex, everything's okay here. You should expect some people to drop by the house tomorrow, cause WE'RE MOVING TO AMSTERDAM! Can't wait to see you. Your plane leaves in 4 days. Call me when you see this. Love, Grey.**

She'd probably hear from Alex within the next few hours.

* * *

 **TO ALEX: Alex? I'm getting worried. Please, call me if you read this. I love you, Grey.**

Nothing.

* * *

Grey was pacing the room, constantly looking at her phone. It wasn't the first time they couldn't reach each other for longer than a few days, but she had this terrible feeling that something went horribly wrong.

Her stuff would be arriving today, as well as her girlfriend she hoped. Her flight should have landed 45 minutes ago. She could be knocking at their door every second now. Grey checked her phone again. Nothing. She had been feeling nauseas for 3 days. Every time she picked up a book she would be reading the same line a thousand times, not able to concentrate for longer than a minute or so. She really had nothing to worry about, she told herself. Kubra should have informed Alex about their reassignment to Europe by now and she should be on her way here even if she didn't hear anything from Grey.

She had been staring at the window lost in her thoughts, when the doorbell rang. Quickly, she ran to the intercom system, her heart pounding in her chest.

"Hello?" Grey said hopeful.

"Yeah this is Jackson, from the moving service." A man growled.

"Oh, yes. Of course." She said politely, while pressing the button to open the door.

She hung up the phone slowly. Surely, Alex couldn't ring the doorbell because she was too busy commanding everyone downstairs – a typical Alex thing to do. A smile crept up her face. Finally, her team would be complete again.

She heard some rumbling on the hallway, so she opened her door. Jackson's people came in with a lot of boxes filled with her belongings. She even saw the carpet she loved so much – her feet always got cold on these kind of wooden floors. She couldn't believe she had this much stuff, even without the furniture.

After 20 minutes of chaos, Jackson told her that everything was there.

"Alex didn't drive with you from the airport?" Grey asked, her fear growing by the minute.

"No, she helped us pack everything and load it in the van, but she didn't say anything about the journey here." Jackson told her. "She did order me to tell you that you should open the box with the books in it first."

Grey frowned and shook her head. "Why?"

"I haven't got a clue, ma'am." Jackson said in his low voice. "I'm just following orders."

She thanked the men and walked them out. When they were gone she stood there with her back against the door. What the hell was happening here? Where the fuck was Alex? Why didn't she contact Grey?

She walked to the boxes that were stacked in the living room with sheer determination. She was going to find out what happened to Alex. She had to know what was going on. After a lot of digging she found the box full of books. She looked at it, suddenly afraid of what she would find in there. She ripped it open with such force, that something flew out. An envelope.

Grey frowned and picked up the envelope and turned it around in her hand.

 _Mathilda Grey_

She truly hated that name. She was sure that the letter was from Alex, since she was the only one who even knew her first name. She opened the envelope and took out the letter inside.

She looked at the letters written on the paper. There were just a few words, but the impact they had were immense.

 _I'm so, so sorry._

 _Alex._


End file.
